What is self-confidence?

Let's start by looking at the nuances of similar ideas

• Self-esteem: how much you can like and accept yourself
• Self-portrait: how do you see yourself
• Intrinsic value: What value do you see in yourself?
• Self-confidence, in comparison, is how much you believe in yourself.

Self-confidence is your confidence in your ability, qualities, and judgment. It is known that your actions will produce results; you can control your efforts to influence those outcomes. You understand that no matter what happens, you can adapt to the new situations you create for yourself.

Self-confidence is not your arrogance, pride, or arrogance. True self-confidence is more than looks; it's a deep part of who you are.

It is the essential trait that allows successful people to act boldly as they take risks, overcome challenges and grow.

Know your true value

Your primary confidence comes from recognizing your inherent value.

Congratulations, you have won the Cosmic Lottery and have a great chance to be alive now! You are a uniquely talented and irreplaceable person. There will never be another person out there the way you do. You can share a name with others, but they won't have the same personality, preferences, and ideas. You are original.

Take this time to think about your strengths and talents:

• What do you like most about yourself?
• What do others like most about you?
• What abilities have you developed and valued?
• What values
• Do you see in yourself and value in others?
• Successful people know the value they have to offer the world: their authentic selves.

The depth of your foundation

The deeper your roots grow, the stronger you can stand as you face resistance and challenges.

This aspect of understanding your value focuses on what motivates you. Many people refer to this as finding your reason for wanting. This is your goal and why you do what you do. So take a look at your deepest motives.

The more honest you are with yourself, the more you can grow. It takes courage to stop in public and get to know our current selves. Do sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll motivate us? Does money drive us? Does the approval of others cause us? We can also be negatively motivated to avoid punishment, criticism, and consequences. Our motivation to avoid pain outweighs our motivation to seek pleasure.

Take this time to think critically about the depth of your organization:

• What is your life mission and purpose?
• What are your deepest values and convictions?

Aligning your values with growth

We have considered our inherent values and motivations. Here is where the growth happens! Let's see how our impulses help or hurt us.

How much of our motivation is directed toward benefiting ourselves versus others? Do both help? Are some of our motives bad for us?

How many of our motives remain mere desires without action? These are the motives that turn into excuses. They are often conditional motives that state, "If I _____, I might be _____" or "If I had _____, I would be _____."

Some examples:

• If I were younger, I would have had more freedom.
• If I weigh less, I'll be happier.
• If I had been stronger, I would have been more attractive.

We want to eliminate excuses! They let us off the hook for results. They also keep us in place. Keep your focus away from problems and limitations, and look for solutions that lead to your growth.

Action Steps:

[Basic Confidence] realize your inherent value: uniqueness, strength, and capabilities

[Deep Foundation] Focus on what motivates and demotivates you

[Align Values] align your values toward positivity, growth, and solutions

Stop comparing yourself to others.

Why do we compare ourselves at all?

When we have no objective model or standard to judge ourselves, we measure ourselves against the people next to us. We usually use subjective criteria outside of ourselves to measure our worth. How do we determine who is "best"?

Many people overestimate and underestimate what they are not.

Malcolm Forbes

How we tend to compare ourselves to others is often unfair. We may best measure our strengths against their weaknesses and even our weaknesses against their strengths. We also tend to focus on one aspect, such as physical strength, health, intelligence, or the numbers in our bank accounts. We also sometimes compare results from months of learning versus decades of development and perfection for someone else.